It Takes a Village

About two years ago I was accused of being in my white, middle-class, right-winged, conservative, church-going bubble. That really made me mad because it couldn't be further from the truth. I've been meaning to write about it for some time but never really got around to it. There is never a better time then the present. Right?

First of all I'd like to say that I live in the best neighborhood ever. It is certainly not due to our spacious backyards, the ginormous square footage of our houses, or the sprawling open spaces and sparkling community pool. No, no, you won't find any of that here in Mainland Square. For almost 10 years we have lived in our modest little community. I was lucky enough to move in right across the street from the nicest people in the world who walked right up an introduced themselves as we were moving in. The craziness of their home crawling with three, and later four, boys was like nothing I'd ever seen. There was always a LOT of boy things happening around there from wild screaming to just whippin' it out and peeing right there in the front yard. Love it.

Prior to having our own children we would attend several of the boys birthday parties and even a Christmas once. Through these neighbors I met many more neighbors. Once I had my first kiddo I realized just how lucky I was to have such an awesome neighborhood and group of friends.

We are black, white, Hispanic, Checksican (that's Mexican and Chinese), Filipino, Thai, and lots of things in between. All those races are married to the other races so our kids are a whole lotta everything in this melting pot. Me being a white chick married to a redneck puts me in the minority. We are Democrats, Republicans, and Independents. We are Protestants, Catholics, Questioners, and Truth Seekers. Some of us work outside the home full or part-time and some of us stay home all the time. When life has required mom to go to work and dad to stay home, those dads have jumped right in the scene and held their own. We have one kid, and we have four kids. We have had our share of ups and downs. We have carried each other through some of the lowest points in our lives and celebrated with each other during the victories. We've endured loss, stood firmly united in our fears, and partied hard during good times (and bad if needed). Occasionally we've eaten our way through or out of situations! I know, without a doubt, that I can call upon these people anytime, anywhere, and I will have a last minute babysitter, an extra disciplinarian, a cheerleader, a stylist, an organizer, a teacher, a seamstress, a comedian, a gardener, a landscaper, or even an occasional egg or a cup of sugar.

I have seen this neighborhood rally around one another during a crisis or time of need and I count my blessings every day. It's just that good to live here that those who have moved away miss the hood dearly...and some even move back! Sure, it isn't utopia around here all the time, but we've all learned the art of respect, forgiveness and apologies...That and a cup of coffee (or beer, or wine, or an apple martini) goes a long way. I love you all so very much. I am a better person because of each and every one of you.

Where have six years gone?

Happy, Happy Birthday to my sweet, sweet six-year old. I can't believe where the time has gone. It seems like just yesterday you were that strong-will baby refusing a bottle at all costs. Some things haven't changed! You are still as strong-willed as ever.

I am amazed at how much you have grown and developed over the years. You have become such a beautiful little girl inside and out...

I love how you still give me a quick cuddle every morning before anything else. Thank you for still letting me hold my baby.
I love that you are so happy all most of the time that you twirl and twirl and twirl like you don't have a care in the world. You twirl even when cleaning!
I love how you tell me the best and worst part of everyday as soon as you get in the car after school. I chuckle inside that the "worst" part of the day is usually someone else getting into trouble.
I love that you love to try new sports. I love your excitement when you score a goal or go fast around the rink or cartwheel around the floor...
I love how you share bumpy with others when they get hurt or are sad, including me.
I love how you take responsibility for feeding your dogs.
I love when you see me baking and get all excited and pull out your apron.
I love watching you watch fireworks. The look in your eyes is unreal.
I love looking at your drawings and listening to the stories of what you were drawing.
I love your excitement when you see Daddy's car pulling up after work.
I love how you love your sister and try to take care of her.
I love that you know how to work the TV!
I love your fashion statements!
I love that we have the same taste in music. Yikes!
I love it when you try to scare me by saying boo.
I love that you share your candy with me.
I love your imagination and seeing what new things your come up with every time you play.
I love that you love the outdoors, nature walks, fishing, going to the Dove field, and your excitiment when Daddy brings "dinner" home.
I love that you are an easy kid to travel and fly with.
I love how inventive you are.
I love how you make cards and presents for us for no reason at all.
I love, that for the most part, you include your sister and play with her too.
I love that you love the Dentist.
I love how you call us "The Crazies".
I love that you like to sing the made up songs about our family.

I love so many things about you that I could go on and on forever. I love being your Mommy. I am so blessed that God has allowed me to be your mom and to take care of you here on Earth. You bring me so much joy. I hope you have the best birthday ever!

All my love,
Momma

My turn as a Movie Critic

I have probably watched a few more movies then I should have lately, but I've had just about that much laundry to do as well. I cannot believe just how bad movies are getting! I seriously have watched some of the worst movies ever in recent weeks. I mentioned how bad movies are to someone the other day and she told me that maybe I am just bad a picking movies. Well, that may be true but I'd like to say that they should all be good regardless. So there! I've decided that since I am so bad good at writing I should write a few quick reviews of some movies for you. :o)

Whip It: Hubby has a new facination with Roller Derby and seriously wants the neighborhood moms to start our own team. He brought this one home. This movie has some big names in in like Drew Barrymoore, Jimmy Fallon, Juliette Lewis, the girl from Juno, the girl from Bridesmaids, ....haha just now I realized I don't know these "famous" names so lets say some famous faces! So I was shocked at just how bad this movie was. I knew it would be bad if it was a Roller Derby movie, but I gave it the benefit of a doubt when I saw that it starred some big names, errr faces. Big Mistake. This movie was horrible! Basically it's about a 17 year-old girl from a small town who doesn't fit the mold her mother is trying to put her in. Instead of Beauty Padgents, she sneaks off to be on a Roller Derby team where she lies about her age and says she is 21. Juliette Lewis character hates her and is mean. Kids get in touble for lying about being 21. It got so bad I rolled over and went to sleep. I later found out this movie is a favorite of some friends. Seriously?! Are you kidding me! Grade: Z because that is what I was doing...catching some ZZZZZZZZs.

Skateland: Dear God! As hubby put it, "Whoever made this movie should never make a movie again!" I grabbed this quickly off the shelf when I saw it was about skating to score points with hubby and to redeem ourselves from the Whip It movie. There was a total of about five minutes of skating in the whole movie. The title comes from the name of the skating rink where the main character works that just happens to be closing. Once again, maybe a total of 15 minutes shot there. I cannot figure out why on earth they would name the movie Skateland when it has just as much to do with the movie as a tree. They should have called it Tree, or Stupid, or Don't Watch Me. The back of the box compared it to American Graffiti. We speculated maybe a Dazed and Confused type movie. Not even close. There didn't even seem to be a plot. It was the worst, slowest movie ever. The girl who plays Alice in the Twilight Series is the main girl character. She needs to stick with Twilight! There is no real plot to even bother writing about. It hurts my brain trying to think of what one was! Final grade: F- for Freaking worst Failure of a Film in all the Flipping world.

Bad Teacher: Cameron Diaz, Justin Timberlake...I just had to give it a shot. We rented the unrated version. It was better then the unrated version of Knocked Up, which I am not a big fan of. Some of the humor was a little yuck for me but there were a few good laughs so I can't say it was the worst movie in my review. Basically Cameron Diaz gets the boot from her rich fiance and thinks that buying a new pair of boobs will make it all better. She is extremely shallow and self-absorbed, and will do anything to make, steal or borrow the money to pay for her new boobs. She is also the worst Teacher ever. Justin Timberlake plays a huge dork. I liked that they seemed to work well despite their real-life breakup. In the end this movie gets a C because I Couldn't Care less about watching it again.

One Day: Yeah. I turned this off after about 20 minutes. It stars Anne Hathaway talking in a British accent. It was SO slow. I couldn't take it anymore. Not much more to say. Grade: F for Failure to keep my Freaking attention for longer then Fifteen minutes.

Best Night Ever: Topher Grace stars in this Dazed and Confused wanna be movie but miserably fails. This movie is so, so, so, SO STUPID! It's set in the 80's. Grace's character is obsessed with the popular girl from high school. He runs into her at a party several years later and lies about working for a large financial firm when he in fact works at a music and video store. After romancing her she finds out that he lied and breaks up with him. The breakup pushes him over the edge and he decided to ride this large ball down the hill, which no one has ever done. The ball goes out of control and crashes into a neighbor's pool. He survives and she helps rescue him from the pool and they fall in love. Puke. This movie gets a D for being Dumber then Dumb.

Mr. Popper's Penguins: So this was a great movie for the kids and I actually enjoyed it too. Jim Carey plays Mr. Popper. He receives a penguin from his late father and several more shortly join the family. It  is through the penguins that Mr. Popper discovers what is truly important in life. It was cute. It was funny. It was entertaining. Final Grade: A- for Ability to keep my Attention.

The Smurfs: This was brutal to get through but the kids seemed to enjoy it. No way is it as good as the real cartoon from when we were kids. Smurfs are supposed to be characters in a cartoon, not real things in real life. They just don't go together in this world. The kids would probably give it a B but I'm going to give it a D for Dull.

And I saved the best for last! I stumbled upon Waiting for Superman yesterday. I was captivated. I was moved. If you have not seen this movie YOU NEED TO. This movie is a must for all, especially parents. What an eye-opener about our educational system! I am disgusted, sad, disheartened, enraged, and bewildered. This movie gets an A+++++ for being everything an A is...outstanding, brilliant, excellent, amazing, moving and so on. Please watch this movie if you have not! I am shocked and horrified at what is really going on in our school system from teachers and unions to the administrators and Dept of Education. It's time for a change. I could eat documentaries like this up! Waiting For Superman

I Don't Have Time

I have a about two billion things that need to be done right now, but here I am attempting to blog. I'm in awe at how some of my friends, some with four kids, somehow have time to blog during this holiday season. I need school to resume so I can get some sort of order back. On the other hand, I am enjoying sleeping in and can't believe my kids have been sleeping past 8:30. Whew!

My sweet, almost six year old daughter said two things on Christmas that I don't want to forget...

1. Among other things, Santa left her a package of Hello Kitty panties in her stocking. She seemed a little disturbed by this. The look on her face was not of disappointment, but disgust. I asked her what was wrong. She loves Hello Kitty. She tells me, "Well, I like Hello Kitty and I like the panties but that's just kinda weird. It's gross that Santa would give me panties." Hubby and I couldn't hold it in. He says to her that he doubts Santa wore the panties. They are brand new. That answer was all she needed and Hello Kitty panties went on. Apparently she was a little worried that Santa was packaging up his old Hello Kitty panties and passing them off as new in children's stockings!

2. After Christmas dinner we were enjoying a cake that was colored pink and purple because my neighbor and I have all girls. I have to share a name, but her youngest daughter's name is Violet. As our oldest children are digging in I hear my daughter say to her friend, "I wish your name was Violet...and then mine could be Fuchsia." Awesome. That's my daughter's new name. Fuchsia. Love it.

That's all I have for now. I'm too busy...but I might become a movie critic soon. :o)

Your husband might be a Redneck (and PETA might come after me) if...

Your husband might be a Redneck (and PETA might come after me) if...

10. Your hubby uses the word "kin" and can't tell you just how someone is related to him. "I don't know...he's just kin."
9. Your in-laws have built a golf course in their front yard and they drive around in hunting trucks and lawn mowers instead of golf carts. "Foster Links Golf Club" (Pretty good fun if I must say so myself!)
8. Your hubby thinks YOU are the weird one for choosing to shower in a shower as opposed to the lake, river, or other body of unknown water and creatures.
7. He beats you in a fishing challenge using a Barbie fishing pole with a slice of cheese. I had the real pole, real bait, etc and he still beat me!
6. Sometimes it looks feels like there is more game in the freezer then ice.
5. Your backyard is covered in bird feathers during dove season. Not because they were killed there, but because they were cleaned there.
4. The first "home cooked" meal your husband serves you is freshly shot squirrel fried up with cane syrup.
3. You have to lie to your child about what's for dinner because daddy served us the rabbit he shot today.
2. Your child receives a rabbit's hide as a present from her father.
1. Your husband ties turkey legs to the fence as you walk out the door to "dry them out."

(It's raining by  the way.)

Short-story Saturday

So this week I was dropping my five-year old off at school in the car line. I drive and SUV so it is a little jump for her when she hops out but she is always ready to jump out as soon as the teacher opens the door. On Thursday the teacher opened the door and she started to jump out as usual. I looked over my right shoulder to say goodbye and I hear the teacher say, "Oops. Oops! You got something caught. Oh! I don't want to know what that is." I see a rubber skull roll back in the car. I say, "Oh, that's from Halloween." I drive off. No big deal.

Later, I go to drop off my two-year old. She hops over to her sister's side of the car. It's easier for me to just walk around then to get her back on my side. I open the door and my eyes are immediately drawn to the unused, yet unwrapped, and out of the applicator tampon. By the looks of it I'm pretty sure its been there awhile. There is dirt on it and it's nice and "swollen" if you will. Now I know why the teacher back at my oldest's school said she didn't want to know what that was.

Now, the task for this week will be to locate the applicator floating around the car somewhere before that scares someone else.

Mary and Joseph left Jesus at the Temple

So this is another oldie yet goody. This incident occurred a little over 15 years ago and I am already realizing while writing this just how many details I have forgotten. If only I had written it down earlier! I guess it is not technically "my" story, but my family's story from back in the day.

I went to college 600+ miles away from home. My sister decided to join my parents on the 11 hour drive to come visit me for Parent's Weekend at school. They had a mini-van at the time so there was plenty of room to stay comfy. We had a great time that weekend and it was relatively uneventful...until they left.

They left early Monday morning to begin their journey back home. I began my normal routine of going to classes, studying, etc. After a few classes I had to go to the music lab to study pieces of music for a test. By the way, I hated that class because the instructor would play so many seconds of a piece of music and we had to name that tune. Let me tell you how much I have used anything I learned in that class...ZERO! Okay, so that isn't part of the story. Sorry. Anyway, I am sitting in a booth my myself with headphones on listening to music when someone taps on my shoulder. I take off my earphones and am told that I need to go back to my dorm room right away. I am told something about needing to stay at my phone for my parent's phone call, police call, and my sister. What?

I return to my dorm room and call a number that had been left for me from the police in a town about two hours away. I am told that my sister is at a rest stop. My parents don't know she is at a rest stop. When they discover that she is missing from the mini-van I will probably be the first person they call so don't leave my phone. At this point I must say that this was in the pre-cell phone days. I am then given a number of the pay phone where my sister is at on the side of the road at a rest stop.

Now that I know that no one is hurt, I'm chuckling. Seriously? How did this happen!!! I call the pay phone and my sister answers. She tells me her allergies were bothering her and she took a benedryll. She fell asleep in the third row of the car all snuggled up under blankets. She woke up when they pulled into a rest stop on the side of the interstate. My parents hopped out to use the restrooms but left the sleeping girl alone. Mind you, she was 21 so it wasn't illegal to leave her there. They locked up the car just to run to the bathroom real quick. Well, my sister woke up and decided she needed to use the restroom as well. She goes into the restroom and into the stall right next door to my mom. She is groggy from the benedryll and doesn't say anything. Sister washes up and walks out of the restroom and doesn't see the car. In fact she doesn't see any car. She's the only one at the rest stop. Apparently mom did not realize it was her daughter in the stall next to her. Mom and Dad hopped back in the mini-van with my "sister" snuggled up in all those blankets and get trekking along.

So since my sister had absolutely nothing on her but the clothes on her back she's at a loss. She goes to the pay phone and dials her boyfriend's mother. Now I don't recall the exact conversation but it went something like this:

Boyfriend's Mother: Hello?
Sister: Hi BM. How are you?
BM: I'm good sweetie. What are you doing? You back from NC?
Sister: No, not yet. I'm waiting for my parent's to come back.
BM: Come Back? Where are they?
Sister: Oh they left me at a rest stop. They didn't know I wasn't in the car. I'm sure they'll be back soon.
BM: WHAT?!? DON'T MOVE! STAY BY THE PHONE. DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE? WHAT'S THE NUMBER OF THE PHONE YOU ARE CALLING ME FROM? I'M CALLING THE POLICE.

So, my sister waits by the phone and BM calls the police. BM stays on the phone with my sister while the police locate her. Mind you, sister was asleep when they pulled into the rest stop so she wasn't exactly sure where she was. The police finally locate her and take down my parent's info regarding the vehicle to look out for, etc, etc. Wow!

I call to check on my sister at her pay phone. She's hungry, thirsty, needing a cigarette (because she smoked back then). Okay, how can I help? What can I do? So when she tells me of the little town that the rest stop is located in I immediately remember that my ex-roommate's ex-boyfriend is from that town and he is actually home from school right now. I call my ex-roommate and get his home phone number. (I'm thinking I am a great stalker!) Luckily he is home and I tell him the situation. He is nice enough to go buy my sister some chips, a drink, and a pack of cigarettes and drive to the rest stop to deliver them to a girl he has never met. Meanwhile, my sister continues to sit at the rest stop with a policeman for hours.

You see, my mom is driving. She's making great time...she's in a different state now. After almost four hours she decides it's time to go to another rest stop. She calls for my sister, who she believes has been sleeping the entire trip, to wake up. Mom tells Dad to see if sister needs anything and to wake her up. Dad climbs through the seat and realizes there are just blankets back there. I can only imagine her thoughts at that moment as her heart sank. They immediately pull over. And just like the police thought, they called me first. I will never forget my mom's hysteria. I told them what happened and that she was safe with the police back at the rest stop. I give them her pay phone number.

My parents then have to drive four hours back to the rest stop. Everyone is reunited and they all go get a hotel room for the night. A full day of driving and yet they only made it two hours from their original starting location. My mom says to me on the phone that night, "But Mary and Joseph left Jesus in the Temple too!"

To this day, when we stop at rest stops, etc while driving we announce ourselves to each other to make sure everyone knows you are in the bathroom too.